Clarity

Seems communication has become few and far between. Not intentionally of course, but you know life has a way of taking up all of your time. No pun intended. Well, Happy New Year! A new era, new beginnings, new opportunities, etc. The last we spoke was July 2019. Shall we catch up? Actually, not much has happened, just general daily living. I had a small (or large, however you choose to see it) change towards the end of 2019 that brought some change into 2020. I’ve left many jobs over the last 10 years or so. Now, however, I’ve never had one to leave me, and it just had to be the one that I liked. In short, the corporate office announced to myself and maybe a hundred others across the country that “the company is cutting costs” and that means bye bye to you guys. Have a nice life.

At that point for me it just seemed as if 2019 was the year for loss. What I now characterize as physical loss but spiritual gain. Conquering your spirit right! There’s something about the intangible things in life such as, faith, strength, joy, peace, hope, clarity, etc. They don’t have a physical presence yet we know when we have them and we definitely know when we do not have them. What I’m learning is they tend to appear more often than not when we have nothing else physical to hold on to. When we have nothing left to control.

DeVon Franklin said, “We’re only in control of two things. How we prepare for what might happen and how we respond to what just happened. The moment when things actually DO happen belongs to God.” This season of life has taught me more about faith than any period in my entire life. What it means to truly trust and believe the “substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” We can say a lot of optimistic sayings but there will come a time when life or God Himself will say “okay, show me you mean it.” For me, with age and life experiences, has come clarity. Clarity: the quality of being certain or definite. Clarity means to be free of confusion, to have focus, and be CLEAR!

We entered a new decade in time, and I’m nearing the end of a decade in age. The 20’s that is! I’ve gained clarity of what I want out of this life and surely what I do not want. I thank my previous job for the layoff, which brought clarity in knowing what environments I will share my light and which ones that will no longer see me. It brought clarity in realizing that a “career” maybe isn’t my forte. I thank age for bringing clarity in knowing that it is A-OK if there are people that I no longer feel deserve my light. I find it hard to pretend to enjoy a person, place, or thing when I know the vibes just aren’t right. It is A-OK to not have the same interests I once had earlier in life. It is A-OK to start again, to start over and over if I have to. It is A-OK to put my thoughts and feelings first!

I recently celebrated my first wedding anniversary. I thank marriage (which is a full time job in itself) for clarity in knowing that somethings are not meant to be done alone. After all, you are making a conscious decision to do life with someone no matter the circumstances, day in and day out. I thank God for clarity in knowing and believing from my soul that no matter what may happen, everything forever and always will be A-OK. The show will go on.  My hope is that I won’t let a lot of time pass before we speak again. Only time will reveal what’s next. Until then…

Peace & Love

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“Becoming is never giving up on the idea that there’s more growing to be done.” -Michelle Obama