Spiritual Growth: To God be the Glory!

“God is a Spirit: and they that worship him must worship him in spirit and in truth.” John 4:24 KJV

I cannot speak about human spirit any further, without truly acknowledging the spirit of God and giving Him honor. I do realize that when the topic of religion is discussed there will always be different views. I am aware that some may not be believers or some may believe in a different God altogether.  Some may worship and praise differently. Some may engage in prayer differently. This is my truth. So with that, I can only speak about my God and what He has done for me. I want to take you on a quick walk through my walk with God thus far.

I was not “raised in the church”, yet my mother was and is a believer in Christ. So was my grandmother. They were not the typical “bible thumpers” who would try to force religion down your throat. Nor were they the individuals who would speak Hell and damnation over your life for the slightest wrongdoing. We were taught moral values and the consequences of sin. We were also taught the importance of faith, forgiveness, and prayer. However, we were never in church consistently. We were Holiday Christians, implying that we were mainly in the pews for most holidays. Then beyond that, we would maybe visit someone’s church every few months. During my childhood, teenage years, and even college years I never “belonged” to a church. I was always invited by friends to their churches or visited the local one that was familiar to me. I knew OF God and I knew basic principles to live by. I was not a Bible scholar and only could recite a few scriptures. When I was 16, during my junior year of high school, I joined an organization called “Christ on Campus.” I consider this to be the first mile marker on my walk.

Being a part of COC entailed meeting after school to discuss the Bible, discuss topics related to God, and/or tie in the role that God plays in our lives. We would pray and then be dismissed. I went to my first ever church conference while being a part of COC. I witnessed people being “slain in the spirit” for the first time during this time. One day at a meeting after school our sponsor asked me “Have you ever been saved?”  I said “no”. She said “Okay, do you want to get saved?” I said, “yes”. She said okay repeat after me and then we will pray. She began to recite Romans 10:9-10 “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.” “For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.” This was the second mile marker on my walk. Yet at 16, I don’t think I fully grasped the magnitude of the change and shift that had been made at that point. Nevertheless, I did feel and begin to understand God’s presence.

Reading and studying my bible became more frequent in the following weeks and months. Senior year of high school came and I began the college search, during this time my mother became ill. She was hospitalized for a staph infection and newly diagnosed with Type II Diabetes. There was much uncertainty about the outcome of her health. I prayed to God for her healing in this moment. It was the first time I put trust in God for a situation that I knew I had no control over. The staph infection was eventually treated; she was eventually discharged home, and began learning how to manage her new diagnosis. High school soon ended and I left for college a few months later. As I said in a previous post, college was a huge adjustment. However, it was God’s strength that I relied on to make the adjustment. Before this point, I rarely prayed. In other words, I barely spoke to God which is why I said I knew OF God but I didn’t know God. It was during the first year of college when I began to pray often, to speak to God often. However, as the years went by I strayed and the talks again became inconsistent. During four years in college, I went to church twice.

After moving back home in 2013, I felt I needed to become closer to God. I needed to somehow get back on track. So I started going to church, a church that my aunt and cousin belonged to, that I had visited a few times in the past. Although I didn’t officially join, I felt it was my “home church.” I consider this the third mile marker on my walk.  I was up early multiple Sundays (without it being a holiday), present for worship service. After a few months my presence slacked and I was once again inconsistent.  I veered off, yet God never left my side. He continued to walk with me. I am sure of this because of the barriers I began to encounter, but somehow overcame. The situations that I know had no control over, yet I made it out. The people that were placed in my life and the places I began to go. It was nothing but God’s hand moving me along.

I met my significant other in 2015. This was someone whom was definitely raised in the church. A month before meeting him, I lost my grandmother. I felt that a piece of my heart left with her.  The strength of God sustained me. In January 2016, he invited me to visit his church. The atmosphere was different. The congregation was different and the spirit in the room was different. I enjoyed it. I returned a few times after but never consistently. In the coming months, I struggled with learning how to cope with life. I had my fair ride on an emotional roller coaster. It was during this time that my faith in God began to grow. It was faith in the belief that things would get better, that allowed me to rise again. Through it all, I had yet to make a real commitment to God.

We talked about being closer to God individually and collectively. I visited the church again in February 2018. This time was different, I felt so on the verge of tears and so fidgety in my seat as if something or someone was tugging at me, pulling me in.  My Bishop preached about battles and blessings that day. He said, “God is trying to see do you still love Him and do you still trust Him.” Two weeks later I was at the altar, reciting Romans 10:9-10 again, the same words I said at 16, I was now speaking again (10 years later). However, I was in God’s house and in His presence.  The feeling was indescribable. I got saved…again; in addition to that, I made an official commitment and joined church. I consider this to be the fourth mile marker on my walk. I had never belonged to a church so this was all unknown to me.  Being a good person does not make you immune to hardships, nor does being a follower of Christ.  The walk isn’t promised to be easy yet with God it is bearable. The following months proved that, as I faced difficulties at work and home.  Despite the difficulties, I began to feel the spirit of God moving in my life. There was unspeakable joy and peace in my spirit that I had never felt.

On Easter Sunday, a day to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus, I was baptized.  This I consider to be my fifth mile marker or better yet, milestone. It is said that baptism is the outward appearance of an inward change. I went from someone who hardly went to church to someone who is now in church multiple times a week. I went from someone who had never spoken in church, to someone who was able to testify in front of the congregation about God’s greatness. This was my inward change. This was God’s spirit.  I have seen his promises manifest in my life. This walk is a lifetime journey. Yet I felt the need to share it at this time because Shenea’s spirit would not be alive without God’s spirit. We may stumble and fall but He’s there to lift us up and carry us.  We have to keep moving in life, in spite of hard times, and keep trusting and believing in God. God loves you. There is comfort and peace in His word.  Believe that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. Finally, know that God is with you wherever you go. Peace& Love.

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9.

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